Day 45

Meh. Class seemed a bit lackluster to me today, but it was mostly me, my mood that was lacking.

I feel generally cranky today, carrying around some anger towards my partner. Make that "ex-partner", I guess. So I was easily annoyed by odds and ends of things that normally don't bother me in the least.

Today, I was SO irritated with how other people placed their mats! Very petty of me, I know, but I don't understand why people don't use the lines properly and don't stagger the mats (and themselves, during triangle, et al). I was grumpy with the instructor; it felt as if she held us in every posture 3X longer than is required. We finished class on time, so that couldn't have been true. Just me and my bad attitude. It was very humid, and we didn't get any relief from the exhaust fans until tree posture. I got dizzy from the lack of fresh air, and I sat out a smidgen of standing head to knee.

I got yelled at, too! I got caught "cheating," in triangle, and my teacher said, "Sisya! You know better than that!" I have a bad habit I need to break. You see, when I came back to yoga, in October 2008, I had injured my back. I had a crushed disc in my lower back, and I'd strained the latissimus dorsi on the left side as well. Doing triangle on the left side was very painful to my back. I compensated by resting my left arm on my left thigh. And still, on my wimpy days, I slip into doing it, even though my back is now fit as a fiddle. The wimpy days are fewer and further between these days, but I got busted today, me and my bad attitude.

And it ended up being a good class. I mean, I feel better now, and I am not as grumpy. I feel silly for all the pissy little thoughts spinning through my mind during class. I am so glad that I went to class, that I'm getting through the challenge, and that most of the time, I am seeing progress, improvement. Most of all, I am FEELING it. Yoga makes life better, even on grumpy days. Maybe especially on grumpy days.